You look at me and what do you see?
You see me. You don’t see the jogging suit I’m wearing, my hair that’s a mess, my eyebrows that need help, the dark circles around my eyes, my pot belly … you don’t see any of that. You just see mom.
You see right through me. You see my soul.
You look at me and you learn.
I love you. Ever since I realized you can see inside me, I work every day to be a better person.
You stare into my eyes and wait for me to smile. And when I do, it makes your day. I see how you’re focused on me, even when I sometimes seem to be distracted by the world around me. But still, you’re looking at me.
My every word, my every move, my every emotion sculpts you. I want for you to grow up to be strong, expressive, brave, independent, self-aware, considerate and kind. For that, I work on me, every moment of every single day.
You deserve a strong, calm, focused and driven me.
And I will be that.
You will not understand the extent of my love for you and that’s alright with me. You will one day, turn your back on me and follow a life of your own, and that’s alright with me. For you will be even stronger, more expressive, braver, more independent, more self- aware, more considerate and kinder than me, and that’s all I’ll ever need.
One day, you might have children of your own, and only then will you understand how much I love you.
Mom, I love you. Thank you for who you have become for me. Today, I understand.