A mother of three, now back at work.
After two years of maternity leave, I am back at work and so far it is a complete disaster. Kids keep me up all night and by the time quiet sets in my alarm clock kicks in to remind me that it’s another day of go go go! Exhaustion and lack of sleep have turned my little brain into mush, and it’s starting to show in my work and everywhere else for that matter.
I drove my daughter to school the other day, we were late so I had to sign her in.
Reason of late arrival: Her baby sisters kept us up all night.
I paused for a while.
“Excuse me” I asked the secretary, “What date are we?”.
“The 4th” she replied.
So I wrote 4, and then stopped. I thought really hard before I said:
“Excuse me. What month are we?”
She looked at me for a while before she replied: “February!”
So I wrote 02, and then I stopped. And now the year; I wiggled the pen around to buy some thinking time. I just went blank. You know when you wake up from your sleep and you experience a short time of complete blank, when you don’t know if it’s day or night and where you’re going or where you’re coming from, just complete nothingness…I was there, except it was in the middle of the day and I wasn’t in bed. I just stood there, until the secretary worriedly said “2014?!”
Oh yes. I forgot.
Just this week, I sent 3 e-mails to colleagues, then got the “You forgot the attachment” reply. I showed up to a meeting on Monday, just to be told the meeting was Thursday and I got 2 parking tickets this week for not having my parking pass. It didn’t help that we keep switching cars for car seat baby drop off reasons, and my little post-it saying “Sorry,I forgot my pass today” stuck on my windshield didn’t do much for me.
I’m completely lost all the time, between work, dr’s appointments, school projects and due bills, I’m ready for an assistant.This is my reality now, many moms are doing this, we work all day, then pick up the kids and start a second shift, feed them, play with them, bath them, put them to bed…
I usually pass out fully clothed, bra, socks, makeup. I wake up hours later, get up, change, wash my face and go back to bed, only to start all over again a few hours later. I still need some getting used to, but all I can say is, if I thought the house was a mess before, well now it looks like a hurricane went through! Sink is beyond full, school bags and toys everywhere, laundry basket invasion. But I’m not stressing over them. I’ll get to it when I can. If you’re in this situation, know that you’re not alone. Just take it day by day, moment by moment, don’t look back and don’t look forward, just now. Simply be, and take the time to play and laugh.
Ok enough blogging for tonight, for once that I’m not knocked out I should go give Jack some attention.