Tag Archives: reality

February 6, 2014 · 11:14 pm

A mother of three, now back at work.

A mother of three, now back at work.

After two years of maternity leave, I am back at work and so far it is a complete disaster. Kids keep me up all night and by the time quiet sets in my alarm clock kicks in to remind me that it’s another day of go go go! Exhaustion and lack of sleep have turned my little brain into mush, and it’s starting to show in my work and everywhere else for that matter.

I drove my daughter to school the other day, we were late so I had to sign her in.

Name: A1

Reason of late arrival: Her baby sisters kept us up all night.

Date:

I paused for a while.

“Excuse me” I asked the secretary, “What date are we?”.

“The 4th” she replied.

So I wrote 4, and then stopped. I thought really hard before I said:

“Excuse me. What month are we?”

She looked at me for a while before she replied: “February!”

So I wrote 02, and then I stopped. And now the year; I wiggled the pen around to buy some thinking time. I just went blank. You know when you wake up from your sleep and you experience a short time of complete blank, when you don’t know if it’s day or night and where you’re going or where you’re coming from, just complete nothingness…I was there, except it was in the middle of the day and I wasn’t in bed. I just stood there, until the secretary worriedly said “2014?!”

Oh yes. I forgot.

Just this week, I sent 3 e-mails to colleagues, then got the “You forgot the attachment” reply. I showed up to a meeting on Monday, just to be told the meeting was Thursday and I got 2 parking tickets this week for not having my parking pass. It didn’t help that we keep switching cars for car seat baby drop off reasons, and my little post-it saying “Sorry,I forgot my pass today” stuck on my windshield didn’t do much for me.

I’m completely lost all the time, between work, dr’s appointments, school projects and due bills, I’m ready for an assistant.This is my reality now, many moms are doing this, we work all day, then pick up the kids and start a second shift, feed them, play with them, bath them, put them to bed…

I usually pass out fully clothed, bra, socks, makeup. I wake up hours later, get up, change, wash my face and go back to bed, only to start all over again a few hours later. I still need some getting used to, but all I can say is, if I thought the house was a mess before, well now it looks like a hurricane went through! Sink is beyond full, school bags and toys everywhere, laundry basket invasion. But I’m not stressing over them. I’ll get to it when I can.  If you’re in this situation, know that you’re not alone. Just take it day by day, moment by moment, don’t look back and don’t look forward, just now. Simply be, and take the time to play and laugh.

Ok enough blogging for tonight, for once that I’m not knocked out I should go give Jack some attention.

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December 24, 2013 · 12:37 am

Open Windows and Iced Water

Holiday madness, everybody’s got a thousand things to do. I am hosting on Christmas day and my mother insisted on helping me with the cooking. I am very particular when it comes to this, I don’t know how to explain it but I like to take care of the cooking myself when I have guests over. Sometimes it’s just impossible, and I have to accept help, but a part of me still really struggles with that. I think I just like to play host, and it kills me that I can’t properly do it.

I blame the kids, entirely. Hopefully, one day, when they grow up, I’ll have the chance to host as I please, and for payback, I’ll make them wash the dishes and clean the house. It’s going to be wonderful having three girls around to help me with cooking and cleaning. If they’re going to be anything close to what I was as a teenager, then I’m pretty much doomed but there’s always wishing. I didn’t lift a finger when I lived with my parents; I never did my own laundry and never ever cooked a meal for myself. I didn’t even clean my room. One time after ignoring my mother’s threats about my dirty room,  I came back to a very clean room. Clean alright, my mom had thrown everything out of the window, literally out of the window. I must say she had a unique parenting tactic, but I must admit I wasn’t the easiest to deal with. Every morning she would try to wake me up for school and I just wouldn’t budge until one day, she poured an icy glass of water on my face. Not only did that get me up and running, but from then on, all she had to do was shake a glass of icy water and let the sound of those clinking ice cubes wake me up.

I’m nervous about writing about my mom because I’m afraid of misrepresenting her, she truly is a wonderful woman and I would be lucky to be half as wise as her.

A couple of days ago, as I was in the middle of my usual mayhem, the phone rang; it was a challenge just to get to the phone. It was my mother telling me all about the great food she’s been cooking for Christmas at my house. And what do I say to her: thank you? I love you? You’re the best for doing this for me?

No…

I say “ Mom, I’m very busy right now and I really can’t talk”.

I know… it’s bad. Why do we treat our moms like this? I hope they know we love them no matter what non-sense we say…That specific day, not only did my mom spend her only day off cooking for me, but then went and got A1 from school and kept her so that I could have it a little easier for a few hours with only the other two.

I know. I’m a monster.

So after I told my mother I didn’t have time to talk I asked to speak with my daughter.

I had spent hours making personalized Christmas gifts for each and every one of her teachers, following her every last request and demand. That was the day she was supposed to give the gifts to her teachers.

So I asked my mom: “Could I talk to A1?” and she passed the phone.

A1 said “Hi”

I asked her “How are you? Did the teachers like their gift? Did they open it?”

And do you know what she responded? Life. just full of lessons, pouring out in every single moment….

She responded “MOM! I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR YOUR QUESTIONS, I’M PLAYING!” and handed the phone back to her grandma.

There you go… this is life.

So how do I feel now?

I’m thinking, if I love my mom the way I know I love my mom and I still talk to her this way, then I am reassured to know that my daughter loves me even though she talks to me this way. Writing this, I have a huge smile on my face and eyes filled with tears, for I’ve just understood how my mom deals with me.

With love.

No matter what I do, or say, she never doubts my love.

And now, I guess I do the same for my daughter.

I learn from my mother every day and I learn from my daughters every day, and the oddest part is that they seem to teach me most about myself.

Mommy I love you, and I’m sorry for snapping at you.

And A1 you better be ready because I’m coming at you with open windows and iced water!

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December 10, 2013 · 9:16 pm

Feed husband first, blog later.

So the Christmas tree is back up, and what’s significant about it is that it was up when I first started this blog, and now we’re almost a year in. The moment we put the kids to bed Jack literally jumped down two flights of stairs and landed in the basement on the play button of the DVR. He’s got the TV on so loud I can hear everything from upstairs.

Oh my! I just realized he hasn’t eaten yet.

Got to go fix him something to eat!

Hopefully I’ll be back tonight.

And on cue, right this very moment, as I’m quickly finishing up this post he mutes the TV and starts yelling from downstairs “Julie! What are you doing?”

I love how he orders me around in question form. Pfft, “what are you doing?” we both know what that means!

I’ll be back.

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October 15, 2013 · 10:17 pm

The game and the blog will have to wait.

I’m trying to be positive, but it’s not working right now. I’m sitting in front of the lap top that I had to fight for! We put the kids to bed and by the time I made it down the stairs, I realized Jack was already in the basement watching the recorded game. The kids were still yelling, the kitchen floor was covered in food and the family room looked like three kids had gone wild in it five minutes ago.

I took a look around and realized the bag of chips was missing along with the laptop. Jack was probably all set up downstairs, watching the game and checking his hockey pool with one hand, with the other hand buried deep in that bag of chips.

When I finally made it to the basement I had to wrestle him for the laptop. As soon as I sit down to start a post, we hear A3 in the baby monitor. Now the silent argument starts. Who’s going to get up? We stare each other down, we’re both mentally cursing at each other. I got up. Went upstairs to find A3 rolled up in her blanket, holding the crib bars while looking out of them, like some kind of sad prisoner. We know the drill by now. Pull the crib forward of an inch, hear the pacifier fall, lie down flat on the floor, tap in all directions to feel the thing, grab it, rinse it, stick it back into her mouth until next time. I go to check on A1 and A2, A1 is asleep and A2 is standing in her crib. “I pooped in my diaper” she said. I know she didn’t poo, because if she did, let’s just say, you can’t miss it! A two year old eats, drinks and poops normally, if you know what I mean. Now, I’m not sure why she says that she pooped, does she confuse pee for poo? Or does she know we’ll definitely change her if its poo and that will give her a chance to escape the crib. I check her diaper, no poo. “It’s not poo, its peepee ” I tell her. “Go back to bed”. You wouldn’t imagine the number of times you say the words “peepee” and “Poopoo” in one day, when you have kids.

I come back downstairs, the moment I sit down, we hear A2 crying through the monitor and now she’s woken A3 up again. “Your turn Jack”. Jack goes upstairs and 5 seconds later I hear him calling for me through the monitor. I go upstairs to find him changing A2’s diaper…she got him. I go attend to A3, while I hear A2 arguing with her father “I want mom!”. Jack and I switch positions. I take A2 back to her crib.

A2: “The sun’s sleeping?”

Me: “Yes”

A2: “I want to see”

So I take her towards the window and as I do I see the biggest smile on her face. She’s just happy she’s not heading to the crib. I show her the moon; explain to her that the sun is sleeping and that she should too… back to her crib.

A2: “But I didn’t wave goodbye to the cats”

ME: “Not this time! No cat! No shmat! You’re going to bed”

A2: “Ok then, I want another milk”

As I leave A2’s room, I see Jack leaving A3’s room.

“She throws away the pacifier while looking into my eyes! She playing with me man! She doesn’t take me seriously! “

He’s talking about his 10 month old daughter. Imagine what will happen when she turns 15.

We come back downstairs, and 2 minutes later, A3’s crying again. Who’s turn is it now? We figure, we should to let her cry for a bit, she has to learn. 5 minutes later, Jack can’t take it anymore and he gets up.

I’m watching him right now through the monitor, he did the pacifier routine, and now he’s stroking her hair while gently talking to her.

He went up, and it wasn’t necessarily his turn, to me, this is romance.

Sure it’s hard with three kids, we don’t get a moment to ourselves, they drive us up the walls and we empty our anger on each other. But once in a while a little gesture is all it takes to show each other, that after all, we’re on the same team.

She’s still crying, I better go up there and give him a hand.

The game and the blog will have to wait.

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October 3, 2013 · 11:04 pm

A real talk: The son I loved and the gunman I feared.

I was barricaded in my glass home, and could see a masked gunman getting out of his car walking towards me. Somehow I knew who he was and why I was his target. I ran to the back of the house and handed my two year old son to a neighbour and watched as he was dragged away kicking and screaming with his arms reaching out to me. My heart shattered, for I knew this would be the last time I saw him. My body was overwhelmed in a sense of panic; I could feel my heart rate racing and my breaths getting shorter.

Suddenly I wake up.

It was a dream.

For a brief instance, I did believe it all. I had a son who I loved and a gunman who I feared. They were all real at the time. Everything that I base myself on to define reality was involved in this illusion. My senses wronged me, my memory failed me and my common sense was outright absent.

I realized all this when I woke up. Or else, I’d still believe it.

So what tells me that I’m not dreaming right now?

Who’s to say that right now is nothing but an illusion?

Quantum physics theorists state that matter as we know it does not exist. They compare “matter” to a hologram. According to them, a difference in vibrational frequencies is what differs the visible from the invisible, or the tangible from the intangible.

So basically, it is all an illusion. Kind of like my dream.

Real for now … until something else is reality.

Perhaps when we die, we wake up from this illusion into another dimension of reality, just like I woke up from my dream, back into this life.

My dream was my reality, while my reality was right there…sleeping. My dream and my life were both real, at the same time, in the same place, but in different dimensions.

Life is the same. The reality we seek is present, at all times. Except for now, this dimension is the one we perceive as our reality.

Heaven is here.

Hell is here.

Don’t worry so much. Just ride the wave. Someday, we’re going to wake up from this, and realize we had nothing to fear all along.

Perhaps, if someone had told me I was dreaming, while I was dreaming, I would’ve realized that whatever was happening was a creation of my subconscious mind. Perhaps, if I were aware that I was dreaming within the dream, I could focus, concentrate on my inner self and communicate with my real self. Basically just think to myself. Perhaps, if I realized that I, the I that I am, who is sleeping and dreaming of a glass house, a gunman and a son, perhaps I, could’ve changed the outcome of the dream.

Perhaps if I were conscious, I would have more control.

If life is an illusion, as these physicists claim, if life is a vibrational frequency, a reality within a parallel universe…then to me, it sounds exactly like a dream.

So how do I take control of this dream? Can I take control of this life?

Is the power of consciousness real? Is the power of the mindset real? How about the power of attraction?

This is where I am now, testing all this out, within myself.

I’ll let you know what happens…you know I always do.

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August 23, 2013 · 10:39 pm

Hope and Gratitude

Tomorrow morning I will be heading out to the Montreal Weekend to End Breast Cancer for the 6th year in a row. The feelings have already taken me over. My heart is already feeling heavy and my eyes are already holding back tears.

6 years ago, I lost my sister to cancer.

I keep shifting from anger to acceptance, back and forth.

6 years have passed and yet it feels like it all happened yesterday. The emotions are still so fresh.

 Time heals they say…

But in my case I feel as though every year that passes my emotions get stronger. I grow older and therefore understand more and more about the impact that this reality has.

It is only after having a husband that I understood the impact of this reality on a husband.

It is only after becoming a parent that I could merely understand the impact of this reality on a mother or a father.

It is only after reaching 30 that I could imagine how it would feel to know that you will only live 31 years.

I’m still not sure of the lesson life was out to teach us but, at this price, it must be an important one.

All I can say is that we should all be grateful for having the opportunity to live this life.

I am grateful every day, and I feel like I owe it to myself and to my sister to make the most out of this life.

Tomorrow is about hope.

Let’s make that Hope and Gratitude.

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August 22, 2013 · 10:33 pm

Bed time: A mind war

It’s almost 9:30 pm. 23 month old A2 is standing up wailing in her crib. 5 year old A1 who shares the bedroom is narrating what’s happening and A3 just woke up by the chaos.

Beautiful.

It’s these moments that keep me in peace.

A2 just tossed her blanket and pacifier out of her crib again. I tried explaining to her that if she tosses them again, she won’t get them back… but we both know that she won’t sleep without them. So this is another mind game.

She threw them out, again, and she’s still crying. I tried taking them for a while. She cried… I held on to them for a few minutes then gave them back. That will work, I hoped.

Well it didn’t. She tossed them out within the same second and is still crying.

I went back to my chair without picking them up. And here I am. I’ve written about the chair before. I have a chair set up outside their bedroom, where I sit until they fall asleep. It’s been a while though. They’ve been good lately and didn’t require me to sit here until they fell asleep. But A2’s getting close to the crazy two’s and so I’m back here again.

It’s been a few minutes, I’m wondering if I should get up and hand her the pacifier and blanket just yet. Her cries are sounding more and more tiresome, with yawning intervals.

I got up and handed them to her, came back to my seat. I talked to her…I shouldn’t have talked to her.

She just threw them out again!

She wins this round, again.

Why don’t I just yell at her?

Because then I would teach her that yelling is a mean of communication that I use.

Because then she will fall asleep with fear having been her last emotion of the day.

Because then I would have put my child to bed in anger.

I’m hoping there’s a better solution.

I’ll figure it out…eventually.

This isn’t working.

A1 just suggested “call dad.”

Ya, call Jack and have him do the dirty work…

Ok one more try…

I tried the utter most tenderness. I went in, didn’t say a word picked her up, held her tight, kissed her, cleaned her face from tears, leaned down with her, she reached for her blanket and pacifier. I stood up, still not saying a word, I pointed to my cheek, she reached in and gave me a kiss. Then I pointed to her crib, placed her in. Sung her a lullaby and walked out.

Went back to my chair.

By the time my butt touched the seat …

She was already up and bawling again.

That was a complete fail.

Jack just came up. He gave it a go…

He tried tenderness, some discipline, yelled a little, played a little, danced a little…

Still a no go.

He leaves.

We should make them pay for tickets at this point, because we’ve become a show!

Ok I’m desperate; it’s been over 40 minutes. I know she’s tired.

I take out my phone and go online. Search for an Armenian Lullaby. I play it and go back to my seat.

She stopped.

This song is really beautiful.

She’s sleeping.

Unbelievable!

The power of music…

They’re sleeping in peace, no one got mad at another, no anger, no fear, no guilt.

Just love and music.

Ah… now that this is done, I should start with my chores… I’ll rest when I’m old.

Goodnight.

P.S Listen to this song, it will make any man, woman or child give in to slumber.

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August 16, 2013 · 2:25 pm

Listen to the rain.

Make sure to take some time to listen to the rain . Teach your children to do the same. Take a moment , stop what you are doing and just listen.
In that moment , you will be in the moment . You will be present and more alive than ever.
If you don’t have time…
If we don’t have time to do nothing, how can we ever do anything?

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July 30, 2013 · 8:26 am

A Seagull in the Garbage

It’s 8 am and I didn’t sleep for more than 45 minutes straight tonight. It was one of these nights where A3’s regular every two hour feedings woke up A2 who threw a fit and woke up A1. At about 3:40 am this morning all three were crying.

Yes A3 is 8 months old and still wakes up every two hours. How come? I don’t know. To make sure I’m a sleepless mother of three. A2 wasn’t like this. Each child is completely different. The way they eat or sleep has really nothing to do with the way you raise them. I’ve raised all three the same, yet A1 won’t eat anything unless you are very persuasive or the food is pink while A2 will steal your sandwich if you look away, like some kind of starving seagull.

Exhausted to the core, I’ve never been this tired in my entire life. I’ll rest when I’m old, I figure. They’re bound to grow up, eat, drink and poop on their own…I suppose. How do moms do it? We just do it! We don’t think about it too much, we just do what needs to be done. It is completely useless to sulk on the negative and concentrate on your fatigue. The more you think about it, the more of a presence it has in your life. I try to take it like a one shot super long shift of a job that I love.

The worst is when you’re sick. Nausea? Vomiting? Diarrhea?  Nope! Can’t call in sick for this job. You just gotta keep doing what you’re doing and tough it out. Sit on that toilet and tell a story at the same time! Hold back your nausea while feeding them and if you get really dizzy push a few toys off the couch, lie down and call out their names one by one just to make sure that one of them hasn’t figured out a way to open the front door and isn’t already playing in your garbage that’s out on the street.

Take a guess!! Which one do you think did that…A2 of course!

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July 29, 2013 · 11:25 am

It’s Now or Never!

One thing I can say I’m good at, is managing to get all of them to nap at once. A1 will fight it and if she can come up with a reasonable argument I let her have it her way.

“I don’t want to nap, please! I’ll quietly watch a movie, just set up 3 cookies and cold milk for me, and I’ll leave you alone until the babies wake up”

That’s my girl.

When the two babies are put down for a nap and A1’s taken care of, Jack and I spend about 45 seconds just wandering around the house with our mouths slightly open wondering what to do, where to start? Start picking up the toys? Tackle the dishes? The laundry perhaps? It has been sitting there for over 4 days, or maybe eat something? That would be good, oh no… a shower! Yes! A shower would be awesome, but who first? Oh I have a better one, A NAP! Wait I have to go to the bathroom, I’ve been holding myself all morning. Ok you go in the shower and I’ll shower when you’re done.

Oh no, A3’s crying, you go, no you go. You go, next time I’ll go I promise. She’s wide awake she won’t sleep…Sing! Dance! Do something PLEASE! She’s not sleeping because this is not THE right pacifier! Where is it?? Downstairs? Upstairs? In the diaper bag? Oh ya! Still in the suitcase! (Because we obviously haven’t unpacked yet!) Ok got it. All this up and down has got me sweating bullets. Please Jack let me go in the shower first. A1: “MOOOOOM!! DAAAAAD!!”…SHHHHHHHH! Don’t yell your sisters are sleeping!

“I pressed something on the remote and the movie’s gone”

You go, no you go! Ok I went when A3 cried now you go!

O-K ! An hour has passed already and we haven’t done anything yet. My fatigue is giving me nausea, or maybe it’s my blood sugar dropping, I feel dizzy…I should eat something.

Ring Ring, it’s a text message.

It’s Uncle Mike from the Uncle Mike Radio Show. He’s asking if he can call me.

My reply: Call me now, I’ve got all of them napping, it’s now or never!

He calls, we talk. So he’s asking me to be on his internet radio show this Thursday 9 pm.

How do I feel about that? Jittery.

Live radio? OMG with live video streaming too?! SCARY!

What did I say? YES of course!

www.theunclemikeshow.com is where you can tune in. Or The Uncle Mike Show on facebook.

Aille Aille Aille…what did I get myself into…?!

Ah! Just relax and enjoy the wave…right?

A2’s awake! Didn’t shower, didn’t nap, didn’t eat…but I talked to Uncle Mike!

See you all Thursday at 9 pm. On www.theunclemikeshow.com.

Send me positive energy please!

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July 23, 2013 · 12:57 am

Construction week Vacation

We’re on vacation. Finally found a way to access the Internet . Technologically challenged remember..
I do have many many stories to tell, a lot can happen crammed into a van with three kids, heading to a wedding in New Jersey . The wedding? Oh ya it was great, the two out of three had a fever , my dress ripped down the middle and someone asked me when I was due!
All this said, I promised myself I wasn’t gona blog while I was on vacation. It’s good to disconnect once in a while. Will be back shortly.
Wishing all of you a great construction week .
Xoxo

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July 2, 2013 · 10:13 pm

The Peasant and the Queen

It is not enough that there are babies everywhere in this house, but the babies have their own babies. Baby dolls, which have their own strollers, diapers, bottles, car seats, clothes, pacifiers, beds and even high chairs. A good friend of mine wanted to buy A1 a baby doll play pen… “Please don’t do that! I beg you” I said, thank goodness she listened.

Instead she bought her a treasure chest filled with different princess dresses.  A1 loves it; she puts on a princess dress the second she gets home from school.

Jack seriously voiced his concern about this today. “We have to do something, this is not normal” he said.

I’m pretty sure it’s normal, but I do agree that she needs to learn to be a little tougher. She walks around in dresses and requires us to adress her as “Queen A1”…and we do .

“Dinner is served, my Queen”

And she walks into the kitchen, wearing a tiara, walking on the tip of her toes, holding her dress up with the tip of her fingers and behind her follows wobbling A2, barefoot, with marker stains all over her face and clothes.  The Queen and the Peasant.

They both sit at the dinner table and the circus starts!

Feeding A1 requires an incredible talent of persuasion and negotiation.

Me: Ok, three more bites.

A1: No! One!

Me: Ok then, you eat all of it.

A1: No No!

Me: Then it’s three.

A1: No! Five!

Me: Five is a bigger number than three!

And we laugh together. Those really are the moments that make it all worth it.

Feeding A2 on the other hand, requires two spoons, incredible speed and a cleaning crew.

A3 is usually strapped onto me in a baby carrier during all of this. She eats after them. Feeding A3 requires a lab suit and a face mask to protect you from all the spitting, combined with a sword and shield to fight back A2 who comes with force for the baby food.

As if all of this is not enough, today we put in A1’s kindergarten graduation show’s DVD in during supper. Her graduation show, during which I had to hide my face behind A2’s head who was sitting on my lap. I was hiding because I got so emotional and  was crying non-stop, uncontrollably.  I was even crying when other kids were on stage. Graduations are truly bitter sweet. I’m gonna cry now…

So we decide to put in this DVD during supper today, you would think I had gotten it all out of my system that day…wrong! I started crying again. So today during supper time I had tears rolling down my cheeks and a quivering lip all the while negotiating with A1, chasing A2 and carrying A3.

A real Circus!

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July 1, 2013 · 10:21 pm

ADVOCATE TO THE PARTY MAMA

Almost the end of Canada day and I didn’t even have a chance to think about it… The kids are finally asleep and I finally sat down, my fingers are literally shaking, my knees hurt and I have a massive migraine behind my left eye. I can’t just say nothing and make it sound like the children are responsible of this… We went out last night and came back home when the birds were singing. (Babysitting arrangements were made of course and our minds were at ease.) But one thing I’m truly a champ at is getting up a couple of hours later to my three kids, hang over free, ready to rock and roll!

I focus on my state of mind and hope my body will follow. I’ve mentioned before how difficult it is for parents to go out, because we feel as though it’s really got to be worth it. If you’re going to leave your kids, make babysitting arrangements, stay up late and miss out on precious sleep time because your children are waking up before 7 am the next day, then YOU BETTER MAKE SURE YOU HAVE A GOOD TIME!

That’s why we attack that bottle as soon as we can. So don’t go judging the party mama! If you believe in “Work hard, play hard” then that Mama should be taking shots at the end of an ice slide, chugging beers like  Frank the Tank, dancing on the speakers and doing whatever the hell she wants!!

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Quote

You are the Cre…

You are the Creator of your own experience.
Take control.

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June 27, 2013 · 3:03 am
June 24, 2013 · 10:53 pm

Julie vs Jack

Julie : “I think I married an idiot”

Jack: “I think we both married idiots”

Julie: “You’re probably right.”

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June 24, 2013 · 10:33 pm

The Real Reason Kids sleep with some light on.

Kids sleep with light on. Why?

When they’re very young they’re not even afraid of the dark yet. And it’s not like the young ones are getting up to go to the bathroom at night or anything. Why do they sleep with the light on?

The real reason kids sleep with some light on is so that you can see them well when you watch them seep.

So you can clearly see them and wonder where the heck they came from?

So you can clearly see their features and wonder, who exactly do they look like?

So you can clearly see how tall they’ve gotten and wonder where time went?

So you can stand there staring at them wondering how you ever kept busy before having children and wonder what the heck you’ll do to keep busy once they’re all grown up.

They’ll grow up and never truly understand or return the love.

Until they have their own. Then, they’ll understand how they’ve been loved, they will love and their children will do the same to them.

Water flows down, just as love flows down from one generation to the other.

So when your toddler or baby is calling for you…no matter how tired you are, no matter what time of the night it is and no matter how many times you’ve already gotten up…embrace it. Enjoy it. Soon enough, they’ll stop calling.

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June 7, 2013 · 9:39 pm

Hello Titty

I can hear my phone ringing. Where is it?

Quick! I’m going to miss the call.

I get up following the sound. I listen to the right, I listen to the left. It sounds the same! Oh! It sounds like it’s coming from the toys. I start digging in the toy chest, throwing the toys over my head. A2 would’ve loved to see this, she probably would’ve thought it was a fun game and joined right in.

Suddenly the sound is now coming from behind me. What the???

I turn around; it’s on the floor somewhere. I’m on all fours at this point. I feel like a phone sniffing dog. Phone is still ringing. Ok sounds like it’s under that little hello Kitty purse. (Or hello “Titty” as A2 calls it)

Nope.

Hunh? Ohhhhh it’s IN the hello kitty purse!

I answer.

”Hello?”

I missed the call.

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What’s on your night stand?

What's on your night stand?

Woke up to the smell of fresh S#%& this am.
These are the diapers we changed during the night.

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June 5, 2013 · 10:44 pm